I'll Have a Donut. But Just This Once.

 Do any of these thoughts sound familiar?

• I'm going to let myself have a donut, but just this one time.

• These fries are so yummy, but I should have ordered a side salad instead.

• I need to eat good tomorrow to make up for all these cookies I shouldn’t be eating.

• Once I’m done with this bag of chips, I’m not going to buy them again.

• I can have pizza for dinner, but need to get back on track this next week.

• I’m gonna be bad and eat some cake; it is a special occasion after all!

These are all examples of mental restriction.

Although you may believe you aren’t restricting your eating, if you have thoughts like these, you are.

Threat of Deprivation
Even if you are allowing yourself to physically eat a food (e.g., I'm going to have a donut), if you’re denying yourself on a psychological level (e.g., I shouldn’t be eating this donut), you are restricting.

While a part of you is saying, “Yes, I'm going to eat this,” another part of you is saying, “No, I shouldn’t eat it” or “I won’t eat it again.” 

Mental restriction creates a threat of future deprivation that often leads to eating past comfortable fullness, sometimes in a way that feels out of control or binge-like.

This is not due to a lack of willpower, discipline or self-control. It’s a natural human response to potential food scarcity.

Unfortunately, this very normal and understandable response can make you feel bad, guilty and ashamed—and trigger a desire to diet and cut out certain foods as a way to gain control of your eating.

Dieting, with all its food rules, will only exacerbate your restrictive mindset (a.k.a. the diet mentality), ultimately creating a more fraught, roller-coaster relationship with food.

If you long for food peace, it’s essential to let go of all forms of restriction.

Intuitive Eating can help you identify and challenge your restrictive thoughts, which can be subtle and sneaky, so you can truly give yourself unconditional permission to eat in a way that both tastes and feels satisfying. You deserve nothing but.


Of course, it’s important to note that some foods may need to be avoided due to certain medical conditions, such as a peanut allergy or celiac disease.

That Wasn't Worth the Calories. Sound Familiar?

Did you know the first principle of Intuitive Eating is “Reject the Diet Mentality”?

This step is critical because having a dieter’s mindset disconnects you from your body's wisdom, including your own internal cues that tell you when, what and how much to eat.

When you operate with a diet mentality, you eat according to external factors (e.g., food rules, good/bad foods, macros, calories, points, time restrictions, etc.) rather than honoring your body’s needs, desires and preferences.

Approaching food with a diet mentality can make eating a fraught, unsatisfying experience and lead to a disordered relationship with food.

Ultimately, having a diet mentality erodes your ability to trust yourself, your body and your instincts, and negatively impacts your physical and psychological wellbeing.

Diet vs. Non-Diet Mentality
Even if you aren’t on an official diet or have never dieted, you likely still have a diet mentality due to our pervasive, insidious diet culture.

Diet Mentality
The diet mentality is the voice in your head that sounds like this:

• I want it, but I shouldn’t have it.

• I don’t deserve to eat it.

• Will this make me gain weight?

• What am I allowed to eat?

• I feel guilty about eating this food.

• I’ll have to make up for eating this.

• I can’t be trusted with certain foods.

• No one can see me eat this.

• I had a big lunch so I should skip dinner.

• I’m hungry but I shouldn’t eat anything.

• I ate so good/clean today.

• I’ve earned the right to eat this. 

• That wasn’t worth the calories.

• Tomorrow, I’m getting back on track! 

Do any of these statements sound familiar? 

The diet mentality is so normalized in our culture that many people aren’t even aware of the role it plays in their lives and how harmful its presence can be.

Where do you stand with the diet mentality? How strong is yours? How does it impact your eating and relationship with food?

Non-Diet Mentality
In contrast, the non-diet mentality—that is, the Intuitive Eater voice—sounds like this:

• I can have it. Do I want it?

• How hungry am I?

• What am I in the mood for?

• Will this food satisfy and sustain me?

• Is this tasty? Does it hit the spot?

• How does this food feel in my body?

• I trust my body to tell me what it needs.

• I honor my hunger and cravings to the best of my ability.

• It’s totally okay to eat when I’m not hungry.

• I love how much pleasure food gives me.

• There’s no reason to feel guilty or ashamed about my eating.

• Food can be such a great source of comfort.

• I’m feeling full. I can have more later if I want.

Do any of these statements sound like you? How present is your Intuitive Eater voice compared to your diet mentality voice?

This Feels Scary!
Rejecting the diet mentality can feel pretty scary, especially if you’ve been trapped in this mindset for a long time. You may fear that if you let it go, you’ll lose control, eat “badly,” never stop eating, and completely go to pot. 

Your fears are totally understandable. 

In time, however, they will start to fade as you realize that it's the diet mentality—the rules, restriction, deprivation, good/bad foods, moralism—that prevents you from having a peaceful, pleasurable and intuitive relationship with food.

Your fears will further subside as your Intuitive Eating voice becomes stronger than your diet mentality. 

By reconnecting with your innate sense, internal cues and individual experiences—your instincts, desires, hunger, fullness, satisfaction, preferences—you’ll rediscover that you and your body can be trusted to guide your eating. 

No Rules, Obsession or Guilt. The Gift of Food Peace.

I help folks make peace with food so naturally I talk about it a lot.

While you may have a sense of what I’m referring to, I thought it would be helpful to give some examples of what food peace looks like.

You know you’ve made peace with food when...

• You stop judging your day and yourself as good or bad based on what you ate.

• You no longer feel anxious, bad or guilty about your food choices and eating behaviors.

• You don’t feel preoccupied with food and obsess over every morsel you put in your mouth.

• You stop adhering to food rules and letting diet culture dictate your eating.

• You eat whatever sounds satisfying, tastes satisfying and feels satisfying in your body.

• You no longer think you have to make up for your eating by exercising more, eating less at your next meal, or going on a cleanse or diet.

• You trust yourself to keep previously off-limits foods in your house because you’re no longer afraid you’ll lose control with them.

• You no longer feel your eating requires self-control and willpower.

• You're excited to attend social events again because you’re no longer worried you’ll blow your diet.

• You order what you truly want at restaurants rather than basing your decision on what you think you should eat or what your companions are eating.

• You stop believing you have to earn the right to eat something by exercising, skipping meals or being “good” all day.

• You no longer eat in secret because you’re not ashamed anymore of your desires. 

• You have much more time, energy and headspace for more fulfilling, meaningful and fun things.

• You just eat and move on.

I could list more examples, but I think you get the idea. 

I encourage you to reflect on what food peace would look like for you. How would it change your life?

It's Worth It, You’re Worth It
Of course, making peace with food doesn’t require perfection nor does it happen overnight. 

For most of us, including myself, the road to food peace is long, winding and rocky.

However, no matter how bumpy, scary and challenging your journey may be, the freedom, ease and peace you’ll discover along the way are so very worth it. You're worth it.